Do you ever feel like God is pulling you, but you are just not 100% sure the direction?  That is where I am right now.  I think I know what He is telling me, but could that really be it?  And if so, how do I go about it?  Do I just step out on faith and go for it?  But what if that is not what He really wants at all? 

I have been here before.  Our decision to home school was one of the hardest, yet easiest decisions ever.  You see I knew He was calling me to home school.  I just wasn’t sure when He wanted me to start.  Here is the deal.  It was 4 days before school started when He laid this on me.  So under prepared was an understatement!  I KNEW this was what He was calling me to do, but surly He didn’t mean, like, right now!!!!

However, with that situation I completely knew what His direction was for me.   I wasn’t sure of the time so I tried to take that into my own hands and give myself at least a semester to prepare, but He wanted me to start NOW!!  I realized that after I went to register my son for school and literally became physically ill to the point that I almost had to pull over on the side of the road.  So that was my clue.  OK Lord, I am scared to death.  I have no idea what I am doing.  Everyone is going to think I am insane, but I know without a doubt that this is YOU that wants me to do this.  So let’s do it.

However, now the situation is different.  I hear His calling, but I am not sure which door He is asking me to close and which one He will open.  Or, if He wants me to keep one cracked (if that makes sense).  I know that He wants me to surrender all to Him and He will make my paths clear, but if I am not sure what He is wanting me to surrender then how do I know I am making the right decision?  What if I let Him know I am WILLING to surrender everything, but I am just not sure I know what it is.  Will that work?

All I can tell you is that I have had the BEST week I have had in a long time.  No stress.  No phone attached to me all day long.
I am present. Which was DEFINITELY lacking in the past.  I am spending more quality time with my family.  Not “with my family, but constantly looking down at my phone quality time.”

I don’t know what this means or what the future holds.  All I know is that I trust Him and look forward to seeing what He has in store for me.

Prayerfully He will make His path clear.  Until then all prayers are appreciated as I hope to see that door open wide.  🙂

**Our journey to Home School is one of my favorite stories.  Watching now how God spoke to me over the course of those few weeks was incredible.**
You can watch my video on “Why We Chose to Home School” here.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PXDyVMuy99s

 

 

Written by Crystal

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