Do you ever feel like God is pulling you, but you are just not 100% sure the direction? That is where I am right now. I think I know what He is telling me, but could that really be it? And if so, how do I go about it? Do I just step out on faith and go for it? But what if that is not what He really wants at all?
I have been here before. Our decision to home school was one of the hardest, yet easiest decisions ever. You see I knew He was calling me to home school. I just wasn’t sure when He wanted me to start. Here is the deal. It was 4 days before school started when He laid this on me. So under prepared was an understatement! I KNEW this was what He was calling me to do, but surly He didn’t mean, like, right now!!!!
However, with that situation I completely knew what His direction was for me. I wasn’t sure of the time so I tried to take that into my own hands and give myself at least a semester to prepare, but He wanted me to start NOW!! I realized that after I went to register my son for school and literally became physically ill to the point that I almost had to pull over on the side of the road. So that was my clue. OK Lord, I am scared to death. I have no idea what I am doing. Everyone is going to think I am insane, but I know without a doubt that this is YOU that wants me to do this. So let’s do it.
However, now the situation is different. I hear His calling, but I am not sure which door He is asking me to close and which one He will open. Or, if He wants me to keep one cracked (if that makes sense). I know that He wants me to surrender all to Him and He will make my paths clear, but if I am not sure what He is wanting me to surrender then how do I know I am making the right decision? What if I let Him know I am WILLING to surrender everything, but I am just not sure I know what it is. Will that work?
All I can tell you is that I have had the BEST week I have had in a long time. No stress. No phone attached to me all day long.
I am present. Which was DEFINITELY lacking in the past. I am spending more quality time with my family. Not “with my family, but constantly looking down at my phone quality time.”
I don’t know what this means or what the future holds. All I know is that I trust Him and look forward to seeing what He has in store for me.
Prayerfully He will make His path clear. Until then all prayers are appreciated as I hope to see that door open wide. 🙂
**Our journey to Home School is one of my favorite stories. Watching now how God spoke to me over the course of those few weeks was incredible.**
You can watch my video on “Why We Chose to Home School” here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PXDyVMuy99s